Another Start

How did I get so old?

I don't mean that in the classic, feel so bad for me I miss my youth, kind of way. To be honest there is not one part of me that wants to go backwards a year let alone a decade.

One day when I was a teen I stopped thinking of myself as ever aging. Maybe I stopped believing I could ever age. Tomorrow seemed so far away that everyday was measured just as another today.

Lately I have started to see that I'm getting older. The eyes don't focus quite as well. The body doesn't keep in shape as easily.

And, I realized that my mother was only six years older than I am now when she died. When I think of my mom I remember her as about thirty five. I can see how she dressed, what she read, and how she laughed. Although the only reason I can remember her laugh is because it is the same as my sister's laugh. If I close my eyes when Treesa laughs I can almost think it is Mom.

Must be getting close to that time of year. Oscar parties and sadness.